Go mbeannaí Dia daoibh, howdy to all the myriad followers of the Bluffer’s Guide to Irish here we go for another fascinating ride.
The Bluffer was speaking to an 10-year old recently, one of those kids who are de shíor ag cur ceisteanna - forever asking questions.
Sensing that the Bluffer was a man of the world, the pre-teen asked: “If you had the chance to explore the oceans, go to outer space or visit 50 different countries, which one you choose and why?
This got the Bluffer thinking – about an óige - childhood and intinn an pháiste - a child’s mind.
The question made the Bluffer think of the things that excited him as a 10-year old.
There was eachtraíocht - adventure, all created in the mind and fed in books, sna scannáin - in films and ar an teilifís - on the television.
Going to Donegal was as much adventure as we could muster never mind going ag taiscéalaíocht san Amasóin - exploring in the Amazon.
A lot of childhood activities were to confirm gender so, prior to the Troubles, boys played with gunnaí bréagacha - toy guns, saighdiúirí bréagacha - toy soldiers and built éitleáin chogaidh - warplanes with little RAF stickers on them.
There wasn’t much talk of neodreacht na hÉireann - Irish neutrality back then!
Girls on the other hand, were given bábóga - dolls and tithe bábóige - doll’s houses to look after while the lads were away re-enacting World War Two as depicted in John Wayne movies.
It was mad when you think about it.
And so the 10-year old boy was able to ask me about deep-sea diving and space flight and seeing the world.
Of course, today’s 10-year old girls would ask similar questions as opposed to what shade of pink would look nicest in the living room.
The Bluffer answered that he would rather travel to 50 countries.
Yes, ag tumadóireacht scúba sna haigéin - scuba diving in the oceans is very appealing but it doesn’t float the Bluffer’s boat.
He is no Jacques Cousteau and gets seasick on the ferry as it leaves Belfast harbour never mind navigating sceirí coiréil - coral reefs in the Antipodes.
And yes, he would love to go into an cianspás - outer space but the thoughts of having Elon Musk or Richard Branson sitting beside him puts him right off - unless there is an ejector seat a la James Bond he can utilize at the first sign of a Nazi salute.
The experience would be fantastic but the destination would inevitably leave a lot to be desired. Do you know any Irish bars on the Moon? Thought not.
So third place goes to the sea, oh the sea, grá geal mo chroí; second place goes to Fly Me to the Moon but the winner has to be a trip to 50 countries – while the planet still exists, of course.
The reason why the Bluffer wants to keep his feet on terra firma can be summed up in one word - culture.
Yes, scenery is important but cultural heritage is better.
It’s a hurling game in the Glens of Antrim, the tango in Buenos Aires, the Garba of Gujarat, falconry in Mongolia and so on.
Cúpla Focal
de shíor ag cur ceisteanna (de heer eg cur keshtana) - forever asking questions
an óige (un oyga) - childhood
intinn an pháiste (intchin un faashtya) - a child’s mind
eachtraíocht (akhtreeakht) - adventure
sna scannáin (sna scanaanh) - in films
ar an teilifís (er un chelafeesh) - on the television
ag taiscéalaíocht san Amasóin (eg taashkayleeakht san amasone) - exploring in the Amazon
gunnaí bréagacha (gunee braygaha) - toy guns
saighdiúirí bréagacha (siyjooree braygaha) - toy soldiers
éitleáin chogaidh (etchlaan khugee) - warplanes
neodreacht na hÉireann (nyawdrakht ne herin) - Irish neutrality
bábóga (babawga) - dolls
tithe bábóige (teehee baboyga) - doll’s houses
ag tumadóireacht scúba sna haigéin (eg tumadoreakht sna haagayne) - scuba diving in the oceans
sceirí coiréil (shkeree corayl) - coral reefs
cianspás (kanespaas) - outer space
