Who would win in a fight: Superman or Spiderman? Robocop or The Terminator? A Seat Ibiza or a Tesla Model 3? These are surely all questions which have fascinated generations of school children and recently I had the misfortune of finding out the answer to one.
No, I have not been watching superhero films – because I’m above the age of 14 and I don’t like Monster energy drink – I am in fact very sad to report that my little Seat Ibiza has been in the wars since my last update.
Attempting to emerge from a junction I was hit hard on the driver’s side door by a Tesla Model 3, which was thundering its way up the outside lane from a horribly placed blind spot. Cue much apologising to Seat for crashing the car they very kindly lent me!
Thankfully nobody was injured and everything was ironed out within a few weeks but I couldn’t help but be impressed by just how well the Ibiza took the blow. The Tesla was travelling at a good lick when it smashed into the side of the car but half an hour later you would have struggled to notice the damage! It turns out the Ibiza is made of stern stuff and the only battle scars it had to prove its punch up with nearly two tonnes of American EV was a microscopic dent and graze on the door and a fairly scuffed alloy – which was no worse than most of the cars you see parked around most cities on a daily basis.
The Tesla on the other hand, with its five-star safety ratings and £40,000 price tag, suffered a shattered front bumper in the collision. As I said, nobody was hurt and all damage has since been repaired but I was incredibly impressed by the Seat’s toughness in what was a fairly hefty inner-city collision.
Thankfully, that’s as far as the Demolition Derby stories go for this report and for the most part, recent weeks have seen the Ibiza churn up the miles. First up was a trip to Cardiff from the south coast to watch what could loosely be described as football. As a Portsmouth FC fan that midweek night was one I’d rather forget (if our players ran half as well as the Seat Ibiza they’d be in a lot less trouble!) but the Ibiza proved comfortable, economical and completely drama-free on what turned out to be a pretty bleak 300-mile round trip in the end.
There was also the small and relaxing matter of a drive into Central London for a work event. Anyone who lives within about 10,000 miles of the capital knows that driving to its centre is a hellish experience at the best of times but the Ibiza’s compact size and agility at least gave us a fighting chance of weaving through the endless traffic. That trip also provided a test for the Seat’s boot, with two large boxes of trophies to carry as part of an awards night. The two cardboard boxes took up pretty much the entirety of the boot space, meaning the rest of our luggage was consigned to the back seats, which did need folding down in order to accommodate the cargo.
Overall, I’ve really settled into life with the Ibiza and almost found myself pining for it while it was back with Seat having its war wounds patched up. During that time, I was largely driving a borrowed Hyundai i10 – an awful tin box of a car which pierces your eardrums if you dare to go above 50mph – and the return of the infinitely superior Seat was a blessed relief (thank you to my mother for letting me use her awful Hyundai).
The only real issue I have had with it of late is the backlit air vents, which shine red once night has fallen. Over the summer, when it didn’t get dark until 10pm, these didn’t really create much of a problem – other than the fact the translucent plastic looks like offcuts from old milk cartons – now however, with darkness setting in early, they are proving something of a safety hazard.
The problem is that the lights shine directly onto the windows and then reflect right in front of the wing mirrors. The impact of this when driving on an unlit road is that you have absolutely no view of what is coming behind you because all you can see is a haze of red lights, like walking down some dodgy street in Amsterdam.
Illicit lighting aside though, the Ibiza is a cracking little car. Around town, it’s nimble and light. Out in the open, it’s comfortable and genuinely fun to drive. No, it’s not perfect but with its return date rapidly approaching, I’m going to be very sad to see it go.
- Price as tested: £25,470
- Engine: 1.0 TSI
- Power: 115bhp
- Torque: 200Nm
- 0-60mph: 9.9 seconds
- Top speed: 123mph
- Fuel economy: 48.7-51.4mpg
- Emissions: 128g/km CO2
- Mileage: 2,960 miles
