Ed Jackson’s life changed forever when he suffered severe spinal cord injuries, which left him paralysed from the shoulders down after hitting his head in a swimming pool.
But incredibly, because of all the amazing things that have happened since that fateful day, the Channel 4 Paralympics presenter and former professional rugby union player has no regrets.
Despite still being classed as quadriplegic, and being told a week after the 2017 accident that he would never walk again, Jackson has defied doctors. He can now walk, has climbed mountains, and set up a charity to help other people who’ve suffered trauma.
“Obviously, if I could realise all the things that I realise now as a result of going through [the accident], and could do all the things that I’m doing now, I’d go back and not have to deal with living with a spinal cord injury.
“However, you put it all in together, and the positives that have come out of it far outweigh the negatives, not just for me but for other people as well. So no, I don’t regret that day at all.”
Jackson, who played rugby for teams including Bath, Wasps and Dragons, explains that his spinal cord was damaged when he misjudged the depth of a swimming pool before diving in, dislocating two vertebrae.
“I ended up being resuscitated three times in the ambulance, so I’m pretty lucky to be here at all,” he reflects.
He woke up in intensive care completely paralysed from the shoulders down. After a week, he says: “I was told that based on test results, I wasn’t going to walk again, but I was hopefully going to get some use of my arms and hands back, enough that I could use a wheelchair and be independent. That was the main aim at the time.”
He says that although this was “a really tough thing to hear”, he had to at least try to move something. And just 36 hours later, he managed to move a toe.
“I was surprised, as everyone was, when my toe wiggled, because that obviously showed there was still a connection beyond my injury, despite the test results. So there was hope for some improvement, and I set out on this mission to try and recover as much as I could.
“I certainly didn’t imagine I’d end up where I am today.”
He was in hospital for four months, and used a wheelchair for six months before he started walking more. And just a year after the accident, he walked up Snowdon – “albeit hobbling with a frame, with sticks and stuff,” he recalls. “That opened the door to the rest of my life.”
Since then, Jackson – who had never climbed before his accident – has been up the Matterhorn in the Alps and mountains in the Himalayas, and a documentary about his remarkable recovery and these experiences, The Mountain Within Me, has just been released. He also founded the charity Millimetres 2 Mountains (M2M) with his wife Lois, aiming to use the outdoors and adventure to help others who’ve experienced trauma.
Despite recovering far better than originally expected, seven years on, Jackson, now 35, says he’s “still very much affected by my spinal cord injury”. His left side doesn’t move properly, so he can’t lift his leg off the floor, and he’s weak down that side. His right side functions well movement-wise, but he has no sensation there.
“Then there’s the underlying things that go along with the spinal cord injury – bladder function, bowel function, sexual function issues, temperature regulation – the hidden side of disability, which actually affects you more on a day-to-day basis but isn’t really spoken about much.”
Recovery has been “a long, long process” but he’s had amazing support from Lois, who he married 16 months after the accident, as well as from his family, friends and medical professionals. And although the physical convalescence has been hard work, he says the emotional and mental side of it has been equally taxing.
“One thing that was really hard was that my identity was wrapped up in being a rugby player,” says Jackson. “It’s all I’d ever done since I was young – I was outdoors, I was active, and that all got taken away from me pretty quickly.
“So I’m there wondering what this means for the rest of my life, what am I going to do with my life? Trying to stay in a positive headspace was one of the biggest challenges, as well as doing all of this physical recovery.”
In the weeks following the accident, he recalls going through bouts of depression and having “suicidal thoughts”.
He adds: “I had to live through all of that, but fortunately, because it’s been a story of progress since then, it’s been easier to get my head around.
“Now, I’m very much the opposite. My perspective’s shifted as a result of realising how fortunate I am to be where I am today, compared to what the story could have been. I have another layer of gratitude added to my life, and I appreciate things that I never did before – having to contemplate never being able to walk again, or look after myself or feed myself or brush my teeth, I’ve got a constant reminder now that I’m fortunate to do those things.”
Although Jackson can no longer play rugby, one thing he’s continued to do is go fishing with his dad and brother. It’s a pastime he values so much that he’s teamed up with DEFRA (Department for Environment Food & Rural Affairs) to encourage people to buy the correct fishing licences.
“I’ve fished since I was a kid,” he says. “It’s something I’ve always loved to do, but since my accident, it’s been a really useful tool for me to spend time in the outdoors. It’s quite a meditative practice, and because of the way my body now moves, it’s one of the only sports or pastimes that I can do almost as well as I could before.
“It gave me something to click back into, because a lot of the things I did before, I just can’t do now – rugby, football, golf, all of those things that I lost. But fishing has stayed a nice constant.
“We should all spend more time outdoors and in nature anyway, because it’s healing and it makes you feel better,” he adds. “But on top of that, it does allow you that headspace to clear all the noise of modern society and everything we have going on today. You’ll always finish a day’s fishing with a much clearer mind.”
For Jackson, it’s about focusing on what he can do now, and redefining his goals.
“I think climbing has replaced a lot of what I’ve lost from rugby. In a similar sense to fishing, it’s spending time in beautiful nature, and being around places that make you feel small and also make your problems feel small,” he adds.
“Life is what you make of it, and with mindset changes, you can get yourself out of tough situations.”
For more information on when you need a fishing licence and how to buy one, visit gov.uk/fishing-licences/buy-a-fishing-licence
