FURTHER dispatches from Mariah Carey World, population one, where the bride to be is planning a big white wedding to Aussie squillionaire James Packer.
Word on the street is that the couple want their wedding to be both private and lavish. Mariah can definitely pull off lavish but the woman who renewed her wedding vows with ex-husband Nick Cannon in discreet locations including the Eiffel Tower and Disneyland will struggle with private.
After their private vow renewal Mimi and Nick used to post photos and video on social media.
Rumours have been swirling about this latest wedding since the moment Mariah waved her left hand at photographers and said, "This old thing? Why it's only 35 carats".
To date Sleb Safari has read all manner of wild speculation (current favourite: her wedding dress will have hundreds of butterflies sewn on to it with actual gold thread) and anticipates that by the end of the week it'll also have read somewhere that they're going to get married on Mars with Richard Branson officiating.
Sleb Safari has it on no authority at all that the couple have their eye on Tahiti as a destination. Sleb Safari loves a destination wedding. It's never been to one but likes to propose it, unprompted and most likely unwelcome, to friends in relationships.
Sleb Safari also has it on no authority at all that James Packer's 'super' yacht 'might play a role in the wedding'. Flower girl? Ring bearer? Sleb Safari's as confused as you are.
Sleb Safari feels sorry for all yacht owners. Gone are the days when it was enough to have a yacht, now it has to be a super yacht. YIC (yacht inferiority complex) is a real but undiagnosed condition and the only reason Sleb Safari will never buy a yacht.
The yacht measures 287 feet in length. That's the length of a football pitch. Perhaps it'll function as the aisle for Mariah to 'walk' down. Not that Mariah walks.
Just the other day Sleb Safari stumbled across a video that you will want to watch on repeat until your eyes cross. It shows Mariah being wheeled on a custom-built contraption to a stage door as a make-up artist scurries after her and another assistant holds a cup in case the elusive chanteuse needs a sip of water before singing for her lambily.
Check it out:
Mariah, Sleb Safari salutes you and the chariot on which you are carried. We can but hope that Mariah and James: The Wedding eclipses all celebrity weddings thus far.
Competition Time
LISTEN up Sharon Shannon fans because Sleb Safari is giving away a VIP package consisting of dinner, followed by a Champagne reception and private table to listen to Sharon Shannon in concert at the Lanyon Hall in Cookstown
Two runners up will also receive a pair of tickets for the concert which is on Saturday March 5. Dinner for the lucky winner and their plus one is a two-course affair in Time Bar + Venue in Cookstown.
To be in with a chance of winning answer the following correctly:
What was the name of Sharon Shannon’s last album released in 2015?
Email your answer by noon on Tuesday March 1 to competitions@irishnews.com and mark your entry ‘Sleb Safari/Sharon Shannon competition’. Usual Irish News rules apply. Entrants must be aged 18 and over.
Please include your name, address and contact number.
Met Ball Documentary
ANNA Wintour has had another documentary made about her and Sleb Safari is agog with excitement after watching the trailer for The First Monday in May which followed Vogue and the Metropolitan Museum of Art as they prepared for last year’s Met Ball.
You might remember the 2015 ball as the one where Sarah Jessica Parker wore a huge head dress with tongues of flames and Rihanna channeled Big Bird.
The trailer gives a glimpse of the preparations and guest list and raises a whole heap of questions.
Who is the guest of whom Anna Wintour says “he better not be on his cellphone all night”? And how much exactly is Rihanna’s budget. Sleb Safari looks forward to finding out.
Social Media Watch
These two could be mother and daughter
