CERTAIN concepts appear incongruous, but they do exist: noise-cancelling headphones, alcohol-free beer, and ‘intelligent Evertonians’.
To that list add ‘rustic luxury’, brought to you by the Galgorm Hotel and its ‘Shepherd’s Huts’.
While those words may conjure up images of ‘roughing it’ somewhat in the north Antrim countryside, in reality staying there was an extremely pleasant experience.
Sure, you have to bathe outdoors, but there’s a brazier if it’s chilly, which appealed to my trade unionist tendencies - and there is also an inside shower. Behind a wooden door with a farmyard-style latch, of course.
There’s no case of ‘byre beware’ here; sorry – I’ll get my smock.
Let’s be clear, this is not me being a rough and ready culchie, impressed by a silk pillow.
My wife was with me.
And she does not slum it.
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More than a decade on, she still hasn’t forgiven me for booking a below-par hotel in Liverpool.
The Shepherd’s Huts at the Galgorm are absolutely top quality. The attention to detail, such as the outside-style taps at the sink, was remarkable.
Each hut is luxuriously appointed with a mini kitchen (including complimentary mini-bar, with wine, gin, and Galgorm’s very own ‘Hammered Heron’ craft beer) with facilities including hob, microwave, fridge and small freezer, coffee machine, kettle, and toaster.
The interior bathroom includes a shower room. However the standout feature has to be the outdoor bath on the terrace – get back to nature and bathe in the views, before watching the sun go down beside the warmth of your very own terrace fire pit.
The Galgorm itself, located just outside Ballymena, is renowned for sumptuously stylish stays, and hut-dwellers have free rein of the hotel and its various dining areas and bars.
Set in 380 acres of parkland beside the River Maine, it is idyllic whatever the weather. Rainy? Look out on the lush countryside from beside a real fire. Sunny? Stroll around the riverside setting. Heck, I’ve been there when there was snow and it was still wonderful.
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Part of the reason for that was, as is the case for those staying in a Shepherd’s Hut, residents enjoy full access to the Thermal Spa Village, which is chief among the many great reasons to go to the Galgorm.
The awards and accolades keep coming: Best Luxury Golf Resort Spa in Europe for the second year in a row at the 2022 World Luxury Awards, and also Best Luxury Spa in Northern Europe.
At this year’s Conde Nast Johansens UK, Ireland, Europe, and the Mediterranean Awards for Excellence, the Galgorm received the accolade for Best Spa Facilities, having been named Best Spa Experience at the 2021 awards.
The Celtic Sauna Infusion very much chimed with me: short, tough, challenging, but extremely hot and good for you.
The overall experience is known as ‘Aufghuss’, from the German word for ‘infusion’. A sauna master ramps up the heat, while also ensuring the essential oils fill the air, aiding breathing and circulation.
Even finely-honed athletes will find this a test but it’s worth it – invigorating and uplifting. If you’re brave enough – of course I was – there’s the opportunity for a dip in the nearby plunge pool to cool and cleanse your skin, followed by a rehydrating thirst-quenching drink.
Ah, drink. Food too.
Wherever you wander around the complex, you’re never far from tasty sustenance.
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Elements, on the edge of the Thermal Village, housed in the impressive Halo Dome, offers high-end panini, salads, etc as well as cocktails, of which there are a fabulous range at the Palm House, and also in the Alpine Garden.
There are also the options of Fratelli Ristorante, Gillies Grill, and the Castle Kitchen and Bar.
For our stay, we were treated to a three-course meal in McKendry’s Bar, as part of one of the Galgorm Whiskey Evenings (see, ahem, below).
McKendry’s has a tongue-in-cheek ‘No Riff Raff’ sign above one entrance, but it’s a warm and welcoming spot. It was recognised as the Best Designed Bar/Inside Space in the 2022 Bar of the Year Awards and received a silver medal for Hotel Bar of the Year.
After my teenage time as a barman in a country restaurant, even my ever-loving wife has grown tired of me bemoaning the failings of waiting and bar staff at various restaurants and drinking spots.
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At the Galgorm, though, everyone is clearly very well-trained indeed. The staff were superb, solicitous without being overbearing, friendly without seeming fake; just lovely to be around.
After the evening meal and whiskeys, we got our steps in, back to the Hut, for a comfortable night’s sleep; for whose less mobile/more lazy/more full (of food and/or drink), there are regular reminders from staff that you can be brought to your door by the Galgorm ‘magic bus’.
It’s no revelation to sing the praises of the Galgorm – but you should still follow the herd there for an experience to thrill all your senses.
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WHISKEY TASTING AT THE GALGORM
THE whiskeys were very good; the host was brilliant.
The only problem with the food was the portions; they were too big.
Never – NEVER – had I ever left part of a dessert that I liked behind. Indeed my wife has, quite correctly, labelled me ‘Two Puddings Archer’ for my propensity to finish off her third courses.
However, as delicious as the chocolate bread and butter pudding was – and it was – and as wonderful as the whiskey-infused custard was – and, boy, was it – it was too much for my temple-like body.
That was a consequence of devouring the delicious starter, a ham and cheese croquette far more delightful than those mere words would suggest.
Better still, was the beef and Guinness pie, with champ and roast vegetables. I knew it was too much for two men, never mind one man, but I still couldn’t resist finishing it.
The Galgorm runs various whiskey evenings (and some gin nights too). Ours involved selections from the Hinch Distillery, perhaps appropriately – it too is set in beautiful grounds, the Killaney Estate on the Carryduff Road near Ballynahinch.
Hinch’s senior tour guide Terry McCartan was the guest speaker and provided a highly entertaining and informative evening. He wore his whiskey knowledge lightly, and although he’d obviously done this routine before, his repartee echoed the putdown delivered by Edmund Blackadder: ‘It’s spontaneous and it’s called wit’.
Like his colleagues elsewhere around the resort, the barman in McKendry’s was chatty and knowledgeable too.
Throughout the evening diners were treated by Terry McCartan to a potted history of whiskey production and more modern methods, explaining about age statements, the influence of casks and maturation, the difference between blends and single malts.
The first of the quartet of Hinch whiskeys, all bottled at bottled at 43 per cent ABV (alcohol by volume), was a small batch blend of single malt and single grain from ex-bourbon barrels, a four-year-old.
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Although he cautioned us that this was “a whiskey tasting exercise, not a whiskey drinking exercise”, the toffee/caramel influence he referred to was evident, making for a very quaffable drop.
Next up was what he described as ‘a savoury whiskey, our main course’, to go along with the food equivalent, that amazing pie.
A five-year double wood, this started in ex-bourbon barrels (for four years), then is finished for 12 months in a virgin oak, brand new US barrel. That, Terry explained, makes it taste like an old Irish whiskey, strips away sweetness, bringing out more savoury notes, of black pepper, but also almond, hazelnut.
Our ‘dessert’ whiskey was a 10-yo sherry finish; nine years in an ex-bourbon barrel, then the final one in an oloroso sherry cask.
Another blend. At which point, our host embarked on a mini-rant against whiskey snobbery, declaring “I’ve had beautiful blended whiskeys and horrible single malts.”
I would have stood up and cheered but, you know, that pie.
That 10-year-old was excellent; in my opinion. ‘A wee glass of Christmas’ with hits of cinnamon, hints of clove, softened by age, a perfect pairing with that bread and butter pudding.
Of course, as he said at each stage, taste is personal: what he detected was his opinion, not Gospel; there is no ‘right answer’ for whether or not you like a whiskey.
Which is just as well, as the fourth was a peated whiskey. Award-winning, to boot, and a single malt.
Not for me, though.
He offered the best explanation of why that might be: my childhood of scraped knees, treated by my mother with the antiseptic TCP. Many drinkers get that ‘TCP’ smell/taste off peated whisk(e)y, and love it. Not me.
Still, even though a taste was enough/too much for me, that could not mar a wonderful evening of food and whiskey at McKendry’s.