If you haven’t given your times tables a moment’s thought since you were in primary school, then get thinking.
That’s because times tables are the hot topic of discussion on Twitter right now – in particular, which simple line of multiplication is the best and why?
The conversation was started by Twitter user @garbagecoven, who treated the subject all the passion and associated filthy language you never knew it deserved.
folks time to pipe up: what was your favorite combo on the multiplication table???
mine was 9 x 9 = 81. it always felt really “adult,” like, “we’re no longer fucking around here.”
— garth “HELLFUCKER” purkett (@garbagecoven) October 14, 2018
With the can of worms well and truly opened, many responded with their own favourites.
12×12=144 felt Lovecraftian, like, symmetry and madness, where does the 144 even come from besides the dark depths of a dimension best left unknown.
— Lee Elliott (@loudandboring) October 15, 2018
@garbagecoven responded: “are you f***ing joking me, how are you in my BRAIN. it’s like an ancient space labyrinth with a layout and meaning known only by a nonhuman race buried deep beneath the Egyptian dessert”.
For sure 7×7 = 49
— Lauren Simmons, Forever 47 (@laurendorphin) October 15, 2018
@garbagecoven responded: “insanely solid”.
11×11 = 121 is so aesthetically pleasing plus it gets bonus points for coming just after 10×10 which is the end of the basics
— The Artist Formerly Known As NeverScaredB (@BenWilinofsky) October 15, 2018
@garbagecoven responded: “god damn, you’re so right. it’s just right outside the gate to meet you once you’ve mastered the beginner’s course.”
Some veered away from square numbers.
5 X 8 = 40 don’t ask me to explain. i don’t understand any of my feelings
— M@thew (@TweetPotato314) October 14, 2018
@garbagecove responded: “i’ve got it: this combination just feels very *peaceful*. it’s like mid-century modern furniture.”
7 x 6 = 42!!! Like who would expect that??
— Steve Pelletier (@stv_pelletier) October 15, 2018
@garbagecoven responded: “7 x 6 = 42 is literally a small and memorable magic trick”.
The nines got a lot of love.
I love the entire 9s times tables! All the answers add up to nine! Mind blown!
— Joseph Johnson (@jage750) October 15, 2018
@garbagecove responded: “that 9 row is where the magic is at baby. 9 row is for freaks (like, good freaks) honestly.”
Of course, not all multiplications can get equal amounts of love.
Sorry to pipe up but the real snake of the times tables is 11×12 the 11s were meant to be the easy ones then suddenly you’re hit with this curveball that defies all logic, head=gone
— Leena (@LeenaChoudhari) October 15, 2018
@garbagecove responded: “11 x 12 = 132 is inDEED a snake. you settle into 11 x 11 = 121 easily enough, and then 132 is there to rudely smack you down like ‘not so fast'”.
Finally this guy taught us all a fundamental truth through simple mathematics.
1 x 0 = It taught me the harsh truth that even if I love him whole, if he has no feelings for me, it will end up with a zero.
— Henri Glo (@chinito_monkey) October 15, 2018
@garbagecoven responded: “this….. is honestly really beautiful. thank you for contributing this to the conversation.”
