A 14-year-old girl who stabbed two teachers and a pupil at a school in Wales has said she “would give anything to go back”.
Teachers Fiona Elias and Liz Hopkin, and a student, were treated in hospital after being stabbed at Ysgol Dyffryn Aman in Ammanford, Carmarthenshire, on April 24.
The girl, who cannot be named for legal reasons, has pleaded guilty to three counts of wounding with intent and a further count of possession of a bladed article on a school premises.
She denies three counts of attempted murder.
On the fifth day of the trial at Swansea Crown Court on Monday, the defendant appeared in the witness box wearing a white shirt and a black tie.
Answering questions put to her by Caroline Rees KC, for the defence, the girl, who was 13 at the time of the incident, said she felt “terrible” about what had happened and that she would “do anything to go back”.
She said: “It doesn’t feel like I did it, to be honest. (I feel) terrible, guilty.”
She said she did not intend to hurt or kill any of the people who were injured, and that she could not remember large parts of the incident.
Asked to describe what she remembered, she said: “I remember thinking to myself ‘What am I doing? What am I doing? Stop’ – but I don’t remember seeing anything.
“You can’t (look back), it’s dark, to say the least, I remember being very hot during the incident.”
She admitted she had taken a knife to school almost every day since she was in “Year 3 or 4”, saying she felt “scared and worried” and used knives to self-harm.
Earlier in the trial, the girl’s father told the court she had been subjected to bullying at school, and alleged someone had attempted to break into their house.
A fellow pupil also alleged he had seen the pupil she went on to stab repeatedly slap the defendant on the back of the head while on the school bus a few weeks before the incident.
The jury heard the girl had previously been caught with a knife by Ms Elias at the beginning of the school year.
Explaining the incident, she said she had forgotten she had it in her possession, having used it to carve her name into a tree.
After that, she was excluded from school for a week, and her father would then search her bag for knives each day.
However, she said she hid the knife in her pocket.
Her father previously admitted he had not searched her bag on the day of the attack.
The girl denied saying before the incident that she wanted to kill Ms Elias, but accepted she had previously said she wanted to “punch or slap her”.
Earlier, the court heard from a witness that the defendant told the teacher “I’m going to f****** kill you” before launching her attack.
She insisted she did not remember saying those words.
She also insisted she did not want to kill her classmate and that she could not remember striking her.
Asked about the moment she was restrained after stabbing the other pupil, she said: “I remember her saying ‘You’re a f****** psychopath’ and I remember saying ‘It’s your fault’.”
Asked by Williams Hughes KC, for the prosecution, if she wanted to kill her classmate or her teachers, she said “No”.
Mr Hughes asked her about pictures and phrases in a notebook the police found in her home.
He asked what she meant when she wrote: “I want to do something humans aren’t supposed to do.”
She replied: “Initially, I was planning on killing myself.”
He also asked her what she meant by “I feel like I’m gong to commit a crime of a lifetime”.
She explained that she was religious, and killing herself would be a crime.
She also insisted that phrases around a picture, possibly of the girl she went on to stab, including “burning” and “drowning”, were an “expression of how I felt at the time”.
Mr Hughes asked the girl a series of questions about how many times she stabbed Ms Elias, and when she took the blade out of the multitool, with her responding she did not remember.
When asked if she had told the other pupil she was going to “f****** kill you” she said she did not but remembered saying “you’re next”.
The prosecution also queried her comments to the police in which she said “that’s one way to be a celebrity”.
He said: “You seemed to be quite down looking but then you seem to smile at the idea of being a celebrity. Is that something that made you happy?”
She insisted it was not and that she was “trying to bring up the mood” in an attempt at a joke.
The judge, Paul Thomas KC, said: “You have done science in school and obviously, you watch films, television etc? What can happen if someone gets stabbed in the neck?”
She said: “They can pass away depending on which area of the neck.”
He asked if she knew that before the attack which she confirmed.
The judge adjourned the trial until Tuesday, when the prosecution and defence will deliver their closing speeches.
